IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The two line graphs below show New Zealand import figures from Australia and Japan in the years 1994 - 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two line graphs below show New Zealand import figures from Australia and Japan in the years 1994 - 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The two line graphs depict data regarding New Zealand
import
Fix the agreement mistake
imports
show examples
 from Australia and Japan in the years 1994 - 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
,
imports
Use synonyms
 from Australia
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 shown
increase
Add an article
an increase
show examples
 since the start of
period
Add an article
the period
a period
show examples
, with
fluctuation
Correct article usage
a fluctuation
show examples
 of
trend
Add an article
the trend
a trend
show examples
 by
dip
Correct article usage
a dip
show examples
 down in the middle, even though it has
raised
Verb problem
risen
show examples
 at
end
Add an article
the end
show examples
.
Although
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
Imports
Use synonyms
 from Japan
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
showed
Correct article usage
a comparetively
show examples
comparetively
Correct your spelling
comparatively
 similar trend at
start
Add an article
the start
show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 decreased sharply
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2000 until
further
Linking Words
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, Australian
imports
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
showed
Change the verb form
shown
show examples
 a steady increase since 1994.
This
Linking Words
 started nearly at
NZ
Use synonyms
 $ 4000
million
Use synonyms
,
then
Linking Words
 rose sharply until
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1996, at which point that
dip
Replace the word
dipped
show examples
 dramatically with almost
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half-way
Correct your spelling
halfway
show examples
 from
NZ
Use synonyms
 $6500 to 3000
million
Use synonyms
 in 1999. It escalated dramatically
afterward
Change the spelling
afterwards
show examples
, and it
peak
Change the verb form
peaks
show examples
NZ
Use synonyms
 $8000
millon
Correct your spelling
million
 in 2004 with
Correct article usage
a substanial
show examples
substanial decrese
Correct your spelling
substantial decrease
 in 2002.
In contrast
Linking Words
, New Zealand
imports
Use synonyms
 began the period at
NZ
Use synonyms
 $3000
million
Use synonyms
 and showed a rose sharply,
then
Linking Words
purpassed
Correct your spelling
passed
NZ
Use synonyms
 $6000
million
Use synonyms
 in
middle
Correct article usage
the middle
show examples
 of
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 1997, which became continuel fluctuation between 1997 and 2000. Even if
this
Linking Words
 trend reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
NZ
Use synonyms
 $6000
million
Use synonyms
 point, it fell markedly until
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 four years duration in 2004.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words imports, nz, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "dip" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "dramatically" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: