Furthermore, Beligium hit the change in male job market of with percentage of 60% that was highest among the four nations in male employment, but in reverse gender it was only 1% change. Neverthless,USA recorded 18% boost in male jobs market and female recorded declined of 2% in 2000.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the contemporary era,
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
common
Change the word
commonly
show examples
important for every person, but
due to
Linking Words
privatisation
Add a comma
privatisation,
show examples
it is hard to afford for medium families. Private hospital provides the best
care
Use synonyms
to the
Use synonyms
patient
Fix the agreement mistake
patients
show examples
at their earliest needs
nevertheless
Linking Words
the cost to pay those bills
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
high and out of budget for poor people. In
this
Linking Words
essay I will discuss the merits
to provide
Change preposition
of providing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
care
Use synonyms
and services for private
hospitals
Use synonyms
are more
Verb problem
apply
show examples
as compared to their unaffordability and
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
demerits. To embark on, private
hospitals
Use synonyms
have more modern
facilities
Use synonyms
and instruments for doing surgeries without any
queue
Fix the agreement mistake
queues
show examples
, and
in
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
patients will get
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
care
Use synonyms
after surgery to
get
Verb problem
apply
show examples
recover. They will provide proper physiotherapies and other related
treatment
Fix the agreement mistake
treatments
show examples
that help the
patient
Use synonyms
to recover after
post -surgery
Correct your spelling
post-surgery
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in private
hospitals
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
patient
Fix the agreement mistake
patients
show examples
get more doctors team to consult with them
regard
Wrong verb form
regarding
show examples
their disease,
while
Linking Words
in government
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
they are always short of staff and appliances that the
patient
Use synonyms
pays
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
their
health
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, to get all these services individuals
needs
Correct subject-verb agreement
need
show examples
to pay a big amount of money from their pocket. For illustration, in a university report
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
recorded that private
Use synonyms
hospitals
Change noun form
hospitals'
hospital's
show examples
cost
Correct subject-verb agreement
costs
show examples
for
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
treatment
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
200% more than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, to run the staff and to buy the best
facilities
Use synonyms
without any
queue
Fix the agreement mistake
queues
show examples
private
hospitals
Use synonyms
have to charge
Use synonyms
patient
Fix the agreement mistake
patients
show examples
more than the public hospital.
While
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
in private
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
hospital
Add a comma
hospital,
show examples
they need to pay a lot of wages to maintain the excellence of their venue. Private hospital provides the best accommodation and hygiene environment to the
patient
Use synonyms
unlike in public
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
Use synonyms
patient
Fix the agreement mistake
patients
show examples
being placed in shared
room
Fix the agreement mistake
rooms
show examples
with inadequate
health
Use synonyms
facilities
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, in a TV
news
Add a comma
news,
show examples
it was shown that private
hospitals
Use synonyms
are cleaner and environment free
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
the
patient
Use synonyms
to get better in their hard days of
declined
Wrong verb form
declining
show examples
health
Use synonyms
in spite of all missing in public
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
.
To sum up
Linking Words
, to run these
facilities
Use synonyms
hospital needs to charge a lot of amounts to the
patient
Use synonyms
.
These hospital
Change the determiner
This hospital
These hospitals
show examples
can be costly, but the advantages
such
Linking Words
as
care
Use synonyms
and shorter waiting times, significantly outweigh the
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
. We can say that private hospital provides more effective
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by seema.dhull on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance connections between ideas by using linking words or phrases to smoothly transition from one point to another.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph supports your main thesis with clear examples and detailed explanations.
Task Response
Add more specific, detailed examples to strengthen your arguments for task response.
Task Response
Clarify and elaborate on your key points to provide a comprehensive response to the essay prompt.
Task Response
Your essay makes a good attempt at presenting arguments for and against private healthcare.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your essay well.
Coherence and Cohesion
The main ideas are presented clearly, making your essay easy to follow.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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