The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The data displays the proportion of Australian
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
in six different
age
groups who did
every day
Replace the word
everyday
show examples
physical work in 2010.
Overall
, it can be seen that in every
age
group
Add a comma
group,
show examples
women
did the highest physical activities.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
men did less than
women
.
To begin
with, at
first
Add a comma
first,
show examples
the
age
group
of 15 to 24 men did 52.8% of physical work but
people
Change preposition
for people
show examples
who were 25 to 34 the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of activities dropped
10
Change preposition
by 10
show examples
% and remained
42.2
Change preposition
at 42.2
show examples
%
similarly
, in the
age
group
of 35 to 44
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
39.5%.
However
, increased a little in the
age
group
of 45 to 54 approximately 43.1% and gained more from 55 to over 65
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
46.7%.
On the other hand
,
women
were 47.7% at the beginning but increased gradually
age
group
by
age
group
from 15-24
age
to 45 to 54
age
group
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
the peak for
women
, in that time they did the majority amount of physical work. But in the
age
group
of 55 to 64 decreased a few amount and stayed around 53% but
at the end
those who
65
Add a missing verb
were 65
show examples
or over
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
stayed at 47.1%.
Submitted by AL NURE FOYZUR REZA SUPRIO on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words age, group, women with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Percentage
  • Australian men
  • Australian women
  • Age groups
  • Regular physical activity
  • Participated
  • Increased
  • Decreased
  • Proportion
  • Physically active
  • Gender difference
  • Engaged
  • Exercise
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