IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1.5

The local supermarket you shop at has recently done some renovations to improve the appearance of the store; however, the layout of the store is completely different now, and it is hard to find the products you are looking for. Write an email to the store manager and do the following things: • Congratulate him/her on the store’s new appearance. • Complain about the new layout of the store. • Offer a suggestion on how the store could be improved.

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Hello Dear Manager, I would like to congratulate
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
you to
done
Change the form of the verb
do
show examples
 some renovations to make a better look
of
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the store. The changes make
hard
Correct pronoun usage
it hard
show examples
 to find products you want to find.
For instance
Linking Words
, you could find
noodle
Fix the agreement mistake
noodles
show examples
 at shelf number two in the past, But, it has changed recently and you have to find it at shelf number three.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the layout of the store is completely different and it is difficult to find items. I would like to offer to use
Correct article usage
a trigle
show examples
trigle
Correct your spelling
triangle
triple
 shape
instead
Linking Words
 of
square
Correct article usage
a square
show examples
 one to put more products on it.
For example
Linking Words
, you can put more items in
trigle
Correct your spelling
triangle
 shape that's why you do not need to change
shelf
Fix the agreement mistake
shelves
show examples
. In conclusion, thank you for
you
Change the pronoun
your
show examples
 renovation and thank you for your respect.

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grammar
Make sure to use proper grammatical structures. For example, 'congratulate you on' instead of 'congratulate to you'.
vocabulary
Try to vary your vocabulary to avoid repetition. Instead of 'find products', you could use 'locate items'.
coherence
Ensure clear paragraphing to improve the flow of your email. Each paragraph should ideally focus on one main idea.
task response
When suggesting improvements, provide more detailed examples of how the changes could effectively be implemented.
positivity
Your email starts with a polite tone, which is essential in formal correspondence.
positivity
You articulated a valuable suggestion regarding the shelving layout, showing that you are thinking about improvement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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