IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Chart Title: The percentage of people using different modes of transport in London in 2020 Categories and Percentages: Mode of TransportPercentage Private Cars40% Buses25% Trains15% Bicycles10% Walking10%

The bar chart illustrates the proportion of people who use different transport. It is divided into categories:private cars, buses, trains, bicycles, and walking in London in 2020.
Overall
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,
it is clear that
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 private cars are the most popular, followed by buses.
While
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 there was no change in the percentage of walking and bicycles and trains located in the middle trend.
To begin
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 with, the graph shows the highest ratio in private cars which is recorded at 40%.
In addition
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, buses comprise a quarter of
transport
Correct article usage
the transport
show examples
 which people used in 2020.
Further
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 to more details, it is noticeable that bicycles and walking remained steady which experienced approximately one in ten.
On the other hand
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, trains increased to five per cent of using over frame time.

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task achievement
Expand upon the trends observed in the chart more clearly by explaining their significance or implications.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between ideas to enhance the overall flow of the essay. Consider using linking phrases.
task achievement
Clarify that 'bicycles' and 'walking' do not account for a change but rather that they each remained at 10%.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and presents a general overview of the chart's findings.
task achievement
Relevant percentages have been mentioned, reflecting a good understanding of the data.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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