IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The line chart details the numbers for oil use in the US, China, the Middle East, and Western Europe and Japan from 2009 to 2030.

Presented for consideration is a line graph
illustrates
Wrong verb form
illustrating
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 the prevalent consumers of
oil
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 utility from 2009 to the prediction of 2030.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the
oil
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 consumption of the US and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Western Europe
along with
Linking Words
 Japan have
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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witnessed a downtrend.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the tendency of China and Middle East consumption
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 experienced an increase.
This
Linking Words
 analysis will commence with the
Use synonyms
oil consuming
Add a hyphen
oil-consuming
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 of the United States and Western Europe with Japan. In terms of the American consumers, the utility was stable at 10
million
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of
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apply
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barrels per day from 2009 to 2015 and is expected to see a dramatic drop to just 4
million
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 by 2030, but still remains to be the largest consumers.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the use of
oil
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 in Japan and
West
Correct article usage
the West
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 European region will be estimated to observe a gradual decrease from 4
million
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 to 2 by the end of the time span. Attention will now be moved to the
oil
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 consumption of China and
Middle
Correct article usage
the Middle
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 East. Contradicts to the
two-forementioned
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aforementioned
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, Chinese
consumer
Fix the agreement mistake
consumers
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has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 seen a rise from under 2
million
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 barrels in 2009 to over 3
million
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 in 2015 and is predicted to remain steady by 2030. Regarding the Middle East,
which
Correct pronoun usage
there
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 has been a constant rise from 2
million
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 at
start
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the start
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 to around 3
million
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 by 2030.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use proper sentence structure. Some sentences are difficult to understand.
coherence and cohesion
Include a clear introduction and conclusion that summarize your main points.
task achievement
Provide specific examples and data from the chart to support your points more clearly.
task achievement
You gave a good overview of the trends in oil consumption.
coherence and cohesion
You attempted to compare the different regions, which adds depth to your analysis.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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