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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Methods of transporation for people travelling to one university for work or study in 2004 and 2009 in the UK. The two pie charts compare five categories of UK travelling percentage of university (train, bicycle, bus, walking, car,) from 2004 to 2009) Units are measured in proportion.

Methods of transporation for people travelling to one university for work or study in 2004 and 2009 in the UK. The two pie charts compare five categories of UK travelling percentage of university (train, bicycle, bus, walking, car,) from 2004 to 2009) Units are measured in proportion.
The provided pie chart
illustrate
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrates
show examples
 methods of
transporation
Correct your spelling
transportation
 for people
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
travelling to one university for work or study from 2004 to 2009 in uk
.
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
Linking Words
overall
Fix capitalization
Overall
show examples
, the units measured the percentage.
both
Fix capitalization
Both
show examples
 years use the
bus
Use synonyms
 and cars than
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, in
2004
Punctuation problem
2004,
show examples
transporation
Correct your spelling
transportation
 for
person
Replace the word
personal
show examples
 travel
the
Punctuation problem
, the
show examples
 most famous
method
Use synonyms
 is
Correct article usage
the car
show examples
car
Punctuation problem
car,
show examples
 it's 50%,
then
Linking Words
 came the
bus
Use synonyms
 around 30%. In return,the least
method
Use synonyms
 is
train
Verb problem
to train
show examples
 3%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, calendar year 2009 shows the popular transport
bus
Use synonyms
 46%. In the case of people
spend
Correct pronoun usage
who spend
show examples
 less
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 train 4%. To
summarize
Use the right word
summarise
show examples
 the data,a segment from
charts
Correct article usage
the charts
show examples
 view
method
Use synonyms
 of
transporation
Correct your spelling
transportation
 for
traveling
Use the right word
travelling
show examples
 to one university for work or study between
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 2004-2009.
Linking Words
Additionally
Add a comma
Additionally,
show examples
 the famous way is
Use synonyms
bus
Change preposition
by bus
show examples
Linking Words
then
Punctuation problem
, then
show examples
Change preposition
by cars
show examples
cars
Fix the agreement mistake
car
show examples
the
Punctuation problem
; the
show examples
 unpopular
method
Use synonyms
 is
train
Change preposition
by train
show examples
 after
come
Verb problem
followed
show examples
walking
Change preposition
by walking
show examples

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words bus, method with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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