IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The two pie charte below show the percentages of industry sectors' contribution to the economy of Turkey in 2000 and 2016

The proportion of industry sectors’ contribution to the economy of Turkey
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
showed
Wrong verb form
shown
show examples
 in the provided pie charts in 2000 and 2016
years
Check wording
apply
show examples
. Looking
Change preposition
at an
show examples
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
overall
Linking Words
 structure, it is readily apparent that the percentage of industry sectors
;
Punctuation problem
'
show examples
 contribution to the economy of Turkey
superior
Verb problem
is superior
show examples
 in agriculture, government and leisure/ hospitality
sections
Use the right word
sectors
show examples
 in the initial
period
Punctuation problem
period,
show examples
while
Linking Words
 the others prevail in transportation, manufacturing, construction and finance
category
Fix the agreement mistake
categories
show examples
 in the ultimate time frame.
According to
Linking Words
 the details, the ratio of
agriculture
Correct article usage
the agriculture
show examples
 sector constituted 24% which was at the top of the list in 200.
Also
Linking Words
, the percentage of healthcare/education and leisure/hospitality
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 observed
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the same level with 17% closely followed by transportation, government, manufacturing
finance
Punctuation problem
, finance
show examples
 and construction with 14%, 12%, 8%, 5% and 3%
Linking Words
accordingly
Rephrase
respectively
show examples
. Looking at the information more
detailed
Change preposition
in detail
show examples
, the indication of healthcare/education comprised 17% followed by transportation
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 accounted for 16% in 2016. The proportions of leisure/hospitality and agriculture sections illustrated the same numbers
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 were equal
14
Change preposition
to 14
show examples
% in comparison with 12% for manufacturing, 10% for construction, 9% for government, and 8% for finance.

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task response
Give a clear start. Name the two charts and the year. Then give one big view of how the parts change from 2000 to 2016.
coherence cohesion
Make each idea in its own block. Use short link words to connect ideas. Check all facts and keep the same spell of numbers as the chart.
content
The essay shows a real try to cover both charts.
structure
Some linking words are used to show how things change.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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