the bar chart shows the percentage of males and females aged 18-20 in a city who participated in a various activities in ine month in 2015.

The bar chart illustrates the proportion of different

gender

Fix the agreement mistake

genders

show examples

aged 18-20 who

included

Verb problem

were included

show examples

in many

activites

Correct your spelling

activities

(basketball, cycling,

football

Use synonyms

, swimming and

(

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

Hockey

Use synonyms

) in

month

Correct article usage

a month

show examples

in the year 2025.

Overall

Linking Words

, there was a competition between males and females

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

males

Correct word choice

but males

show examples

taked

Correct your spelling

took

the lead with 3

activites

Correct your spelling

activities

. The highest percentage was

football

Use synonyms

and cycling in

man

Check wording

men

show examples

and woman respectivelly.

Hockey

Use synonyms

was in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

last

Linking Words

place in both

gender

Fix the agreement mistake

genders

show examples

. In males, basketball and cycling were approximetly 30%. After that,

football

Use synonyms

hit the peak with more than half,

Linking Words

However

Correct word choice

however,

show examples

swimming had a proportion 20%

which

Punctuation problem

, which

show examples

is less than half of half.

Hockey

Use synonyms

hit the low and

chosen

Verb problem

was chosen

show examples

the

Change preposition

as the

show examples

last

Linking Words

activity that

man

Fix the agreement mistake

men

show examples

did with the number around 10%. In females, Basketball and

Football

Use synonyms

didn't selected too much

the

Punctuation problem

; the

show examples

percentage is around 10%. Cycling

preferred

Verb problem

was preferred

show examples

most with 40%. Swimming was

also

Linking Words

a better activity choice for woman and the amount is around 35%.

Altought

Correct your spelling

Although

Hockey

Use synonyms

had again decided the minimum with approximetly 5%.

ruzgar.yalkin27

Apr 1, 2026

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words football, hockey with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.

▼

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

158 words

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the bar chart shows the percentage of males and females aged 18-20 in a city who participated in a various activities in ine month in 2015.

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In many countries paying for things using mobile phones (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our times is the loss particular species of plants and animals. Other say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.