IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows food consumption in Australia between 1950 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

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The diagram depicts the
food
Use synonyms
 consumed in
australia
Fix capitalization
Australia
show examples
 from the year 1950 to 2010. different 5
food
Use synonyms
 categories
includes
Correct subject-verb agreement
include
show examples
vegetables
Use synonyms
, fruit, Meat, Bread and
sea
Correct your spelling
seafood
food
Use synonyms
. It is notable that the favouring towards
vegetables
Use synonyms
 and fruits
were
Verb problem
apply
show examples
increased by the 20th century.
Whereas
Linking Words
 the percentage of
eating of
Check wording
apply
show examples
meat
got
Check wording
consumption
show examples
 declined to 80
kg
Use synonyms
 per person by the end of 2010.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it is clear from the picture that the amount of Consumption of
vegetables
Use synonyms
 was at 140
kg
Use synonyms
 per person per year
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the
starting
Replace the word
start
 of 1950,
it
Correct word choice
and it
show examples
 peaked
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 160
kg
Use synonyms
 by 2010. Even though it
got
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 fluctuated annual average from 1960 to 1990, it is seen that
no
Verb problem
there was no
show examples
 alteration but increased consumption after 1990. Not only
vegetables
Use synonyms
 but
also
Linking Words
 fruits
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 become
favourite
Correct article usage
a favourite
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 diet of individuals,
that’s why it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is shown in the graph that there is no decline but
consequent
Correct article usage
a consequent
show examples
 incline of fruit intake from 1970 to 2010.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
It
Fix capitalization
it
show examples
 is surprising that by the end of 1990, the meat consumption
was
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 gradually decreased and ended up
in to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 80kg average per year. The love towards bread went
many
Change preposition
through many
show examples
fluctuation
Fix the agreement mistake
fluctuations
show examples
 over the years
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 there was
no
Rephrase
not
show examples
 that much difference if compared between the starting and ending years.
Sea
Correct your spelling
Seafood
food
Use synonyms
 was not an
Australia
Correct word choice
Australian
show examples
 thing, because the Annual average didn’t undergo any changes over a lifetime of 60 years.

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Contractions: Don't use contractions.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words food, vegetables, kg with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "declined" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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