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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#show #proportions #british #students #university #england #languages #addition #english #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given pie charts represent the number of British
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 percentagewise who are capable of speaking other languages rather than their native
language
Use synonyms
 in a particular university, in
Change the article
the year
show examples
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 2000 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be observed in
both
Use synonyms
years
Use synonyms
 that
Spanish
Change the article
the Spanish
show examples
language
Use synonyms
 was the
second
Linking Words
 most popular after English with the highest figure among
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, German was the least
language
Use synonyms
 used in
both
Use synonyms
years
Use synonyms
. In 2000,
Spanish
Add an article
the Spanish
show examples
language
Use synonyms
 was famous among
student
Use synonyms
 with
one
Add a hyphen
one-third
show examples
third
Linking Words
 of the figures
while
Linking Words
 German and
two
Correct article usage
the two
show examples
 other languages
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 identical with 10% each.
Similarly
Linking Words
, French and another
language
Use synonyms
 were
both
Use synonyms
 equal with 15%. After 10
years
Use synonyms
, Spanish was yet the top
language
Use synonyms
 and gained a slight increase of 5% reaching 35%. Meanwhile, the figure for German didn’t change and stood at 10. Comparing
both
Use synonyms
years
Use synonyms
,
both
Use synonyms
 another
language
Use synonyms
 and two other
Use synonyms
language
Change to a plural noun
languages
show examples
 experienced
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
growth
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 5% reaching 20% and 15% respectively. As for the
Student
Use synonyms
 who
speak
Change the verb form
speaks
show examples
 only English, the percentage fall from 20% in 2000 to half of that by the end of the period.
Submitted by ashrafyazed on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words student, language, both, years with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • multilingualism
  • globalisation
  • immigration
  • education policy
  • career prospects
  • cultural understanding
  • distribution
  • percentage
  • increased/decreased
  • significant
  • trends
  • shifts
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