Some people feel that certain workers like nurses, doctors and teachers are undervalued and should be paid more, especially when other people like film actors or company bosses are paid huge sums of money that are out of proportion to the importance of the work that they do. -How far do you agree? -What criteria should be used to decide how much people are paid?

It can be a belief of
few people
Suggestion
the few people
that medical and educational professionals have less value and are not well paid as compared to
film
actors or corporate executives. I agree
to
Suggestion
with
this
opinion in regard of compensations,
however as
Accept comma addition
however, as
long the value is concerned, I believe Doctors and Teachers are much more valuable than
film
actors. I will elaborate my view point as follow. In my opinion the value of teachers and Doctors is always much higher than the
film
actors because teachers play a vital role in personality development of a person by educating him and to make him a useful literate part of the society.
Samelike
Suggestion
Same like
, Doctors are the equally important in our life, as they work day and night for our health and care and treat us in so many
emergency
Suggestion
emergencies
and life threatening situations, whereas
on the other hand
film
actors have importance for some people only just for
sake
Suggestion
the sake
of entertainment.
so
to a very great extent or degree
So
we can say that Doctors & Teachers are important to every person of
society but
Accept comma addition
society, but
film
actors are just an option for entertainment rather than necessity. As long the wages or returns are concerned, undoubtedly, the media celebrities or corporate executives are far ahead than teachers and doctors. Since
Film
making has become an industry and actors are paid by
film
producers because these producers earn a lot by selling leisure time to its viewers and
also
, they have very strong sponsors like multinational companies.
Similarly
company’s key management persons are being paid by rich business owners. Whereas the doctors and teachers in public
sector
dependent on Government’s limited resources, so ultimately their earnings are not that much
high
Suggestion
higher
,
however
, some of medical and teaching professionals working in
private
Suggestion
the private sector
sector
earn much better than those working in
public
Suggestion
the public sector
sector
. In conclusion, I would say that
its
it is
it's
not logical to compare the Doctor or teachers with
Film
Industry or business workers as both groups belong to
very different
Suggestion
a very different sector
the very different sector
very different sectors
sector
of life.
However
,
Accept space
,
Keeping in view the importance of doctors and teachers in society, Governments must allocate a handsome budget for medical and teaching professionals.
Submitted by Abdul Satti on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: