IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Most high level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 per cent female. Companies should be require to allocate a certain percentage of these position to women. Do you agree?

#level #positions #companies #men #workforce #countries #cent #percentage #position #women
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Modern times have influenced different aspects of human
life
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such
Linking Words
 as styles of making money that it has been changing
everyday
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every day
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.
This
Linking Words
 transformation cause
that
Correct word choice
apply
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many workers who live off using
Correct pronoun usage
their brain
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brain
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brains
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instead
Linking Words
 of
Add an article
the body
a body
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body
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bodies
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 in closed areas
,
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apply
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 had started feeling depressive at the
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beginning
begining
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beginning
 of
20th
Correct article usage
the 20th
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centuries
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century
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 along with urban growth. In
Linking Words
last
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the last
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 decades,
office
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 employees who are called white-collar
,
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apply
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 began seeking a solution way for
overcoming
Wrong verb form
overcome
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 stressful
life
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. One of the most popular
method
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methods
show examples
 is giving up the job and settling
a
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in a
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small village for coping with dull
office
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life
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 idea is not practicable because of two main
reason
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reasons
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: urban opportunities and
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
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life style
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lifestyle
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.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
although
Linking Words
 city
life
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 has many negative effects on human
pshychology
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psychology
, it submits several
potentiality
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potentialities
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 to
people
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such
Linking Words
 as education, health services, and cultural activities.
Therefore
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, these things
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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mentioned above, make
difficult
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it difficult
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getaway
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get away
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 from cities. To illustrate, if
labored
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laboured
show examples
people
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 have
child
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children
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, they must take care
school
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of school
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 issues which can solve in cities easier than
countrysides
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countryside
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 as well
cultural
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as cultural
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 advancement.
Moreover
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,
agedness
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ageing
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 when
people
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 encounter many medical problems
,
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apply
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 should be considered for reaching health care services which are unavailable properly in rural. Another challenge for working
people
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 who
want
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won't
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quit
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to quit
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 their positions and move out of cities is that they have got used to
living
Correct article usage
the living
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 conditions of urban especially working habits. In fact, earning money in rural areas
mostly
Add a missing verb
is mostly
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 based on physical power like harvest, building, and animal
husbandary
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husbandry
.
Thus
Linking Words
,
Add an article
the realty
show examples
Correct your spelling
reality
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realty
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reality
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 of rural
life
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harder
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is harder
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 than
dreams
Correct article usage
the dreams
show examples
 of
office
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 workers which
involve
Correct subject-verb agreement
involves
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 quiet and natural living. Briefly, due to solutions of
office
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 employees for changing their
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
, rustic
life
Use synonyms
 has many difficulties
such
Linking Words
 as making money, living habits, education, health, and cultural facilities. It seems to me
office
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 workers should prefer another way for increasing degree of stress like
findig
Correct your spelling
finding
 diverse hobbies rather than fundamental plans.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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