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Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The two figures below show the rate of criminal convictions among men and women of different ages in the UK and the proportion of male and female prison inmates in the British prison system.

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A glance at the figures provided reveals some information approximately the age and the sex of the British criminals and the
percentage
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 of all convictions.
Overall
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, it is obvious that the
percentage
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 of male convicts makes up a huger number in comparison with female offenders.
Moreover
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, both genders committed more crimes
in
Change preposition
than
show examples
 their 20
years
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 old.
According to
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 the given line graphs, the rate of perpetration among 10-year-old girls makes up 0% of the conviction population.
This
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 rate peaks somewhere in the vicinity of 5%
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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20
years
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 old and declines to 4%
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
25
years
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 old and remained stable until
their
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apply
show examples
30
years
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 old. As the age rises, the
percentage
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 of crime drops. So when women reach 60
years
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 old, their conviction
percentage
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 becomes zero.
On the other hand
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, 2% of convictions are made up of 10-year-old boys and the
percentage
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 soars,when boys are in their 20
years
Use synonyms
 old. After that, it plunges to about 2% among 60-year-old men.
Submitted by Maryamrajaeenia77 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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