Most high-level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 per cent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. To what extent do you agree?

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Although

Linking Words

women are taking more than half of the workforce in many developed countries, it is not uncommon to see more men in top positions. Companies must give a certain percentage of high-level positions to women. In my opinion, the sex of a worker does not matter.If we

will be

Wrong verb form

are

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required to allocate some statues only to ladies, several problems might occur. and we only have to give these statuses to people who deserve them.

Firstly

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, there are no limits for ladies to achieving success in their careers. It only depends on how much and how well the person works. If we will prioritize gender over skills, it may lead us to a catastrophe. To illustrate, a similar idea had a beginning in 2022 in a corporation called Apple. Owners decided to only allow 50% of managers to be men.

Consequently

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, Apple faces a lot of obstacles

due to

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the lack of professional managers. So they are hiring random women in order to hire men.

That is

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an extra problem that could be avoided without rules related to gender.

Also

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, there are some problems related to being a mother.

Because when

Correct word choice

When

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Father

Correct article usage

a Father

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has a child, he starts to work even more to earn enough money and support his child. And Mothers, are not able to do so, because they have to raise their children.

For example

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, the vice-prime minister of Switzerland in 2013 was a woman. After two years in

this

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position, she became pregnant and was unable to continue her job.

As a result

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,that

made

Verb problem

caused

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a lot of trouble for the entire country. In conclusion, only worthy people have to be bosses. It would be a bad idea to only allow certain percentages of high positions to have a particular sex.

Moreover

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, girls may become a mother, which creates an extra issue.

muharodnoyWed Jun 14 2023

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task response

Your essay does not fully address the prompt. It is important to clearly state your position and provide a balanced argument.

coherence and cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present but need improvement. Your ideas lack logical development and coherence between paragraphs.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

302 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Gender diversity
Affirmative action
Meritocracy
Quotas
Glass ceiling
Legal enforcement
Tokenism
Voluntary measures
Career progression
Representation
Workforce parity
Backlash
Historical imbalances
Corporate governance
Inclusive practices
Boardroom dynamics
Gender norms
Unconscious bias
Regulatory frameworks
Corporate ladder

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Most high-level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 per cent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. To what extent do you agree?

In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

IELTS The rise of social media influencers has changed the landscape of advertising and marketing. Do the advantages of influencer marketing outweigh the disadvantages?

The free movement of goods across national borders has long been a controversial issue. Some people argue that it is necessary for economic growth, while others claim that it damages local industries. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?