One of your friends wants to apply for a job at a summer school camp as a sports trainer.Write a letter to the manager to recommend your friend in your letter. say how well you know your friend describe the qualifications and experience that your friend has explain why your friend would be suitable for this job

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to recommend my friend as a sports instructor at the summer temporary camp that belongs to you. I think the experience she has is suitable for your camp.
Firstly
,my friend Kylie is my childhood friend, we have been studying in the same class since fifth grade.
Well
Add the punctuation
Well,
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she has now graduated.Kylie has 3 years of experience in
sports
Correct article usage
a sports
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centre which is located
Yunusobod
Change preposition
in Yunusobod
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.
Secondly
,she is 3 times
national
Correct article usage
the national
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champion in
Taekwando
Correct your spelling
Taekwondo
.
Thirdly
,she has
also
worked as a
Taekwando
Correct your spelling
Taekwondo
coach in primary school.
Finally
,she is
enthusiastic
Add an article
an enthusiastic
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person
also
, she can get
along with
young
Correct article usage
the young
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generation. I hope, based on qualifications and prior experience she has , she would be suitable for
this
sports instructor in your summer school camp.I would like to request you to go through her CV.If you have any kind of questions about her personal details , I would be pleased to answer. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully Jasmina
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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coherence cohesion
To achieve a higher score in 'Logical Structure', aim to organize your thoughts more clearly. Introduce each section of your letter with a clear topic sentence that previews the content of that paragraph. This helps the reader follow your argument more easily.
coherence cohesion
For 'Greeting and Closing', you have demonstrated an understanding of the proper format for a formal letter. To refine it further, ensure that your closing salutation matches the level of formality of your greeting. Since you started with 'Dear Sir or Madam,', 'Yours faithfully' is appropriately matched. Always reassess the consistency of formality throughout your letter.
coherence cohesion
To improve 'Single Idea per Paragraph', make sure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. Your letter generally follows this rule, but refining your topic sentences and ensuring all supporting sentences directly relate to the main idea will strengthen your argument and the clarity of each paragraph.
task achievement
In terms of 'Complete Response', your letter addresses all three bullet points from the prompt well. To enhance your score, you could elaborate further on how your friend's specific qualities and experiences make her uniquely suitable for the position, linking each trait directly to the demands of the job.
task achievement
Regarding 'Suitable Writing Tone', you've appropriately used a formal tone suitable for a letter of recommendation. To polish this further, focus on the precision and variety of your vocabulary to convey respect and professionalism. Avoid informal language and ensure your word choice consistently reflects the formal context of your letter.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ardent enthusiast
  • physical education
  • sportsmanship
  • pragmatic approach
  • diligence
  • team spirit
  • engaging personality
  • mentorship
  • leadership qualities
  • communication skills
  • first-aid certified
  • discipline
  • adaptability
  • youth mentor
  • enthusiastic
  • influential coach
  • role model
  • positive reinforcement
  • camaraderie
  • empathy
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