The pie charts give information about the proportion males and females in employment in six categories divided into manual and non-manual occupations

The pie charts give information about the proportion males and females in employment  in six  categories  divided into manual and non-manual occupations
This
chart reveals information about the employment percentage of both genders in six occupations which are categorised into manual and non-manual professions.
Overall
, it can be observed that the majority of females choose corporate jobs over manual,
while
over half, of men prefer to earn money through crafts and performing labour duties. For females, 31% pursued their career as a clerk or in related fields.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
the job rate in the managerial roles was 2% less at 29% compared to the clerical positions. Around 27% show interest in other manual categories.
whereas
, the least desired by women were jobs in other non-manual positions at 9 %. Only 4% of them worked as craftsmen and general labourers. Of men, more than 50% got employed doing manual work with craft at 24%, general workers at 2% and other manual tasks at 26%.
However
, in the non-manual category maximum of males(36%) preferred to work as professionals, and only about one-third of
this
figure worked on clerical and other tasks.
Submitted by plkkhati on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!