The charts below show the comparison of time spent, in minutes per day, by UK males and females on household and leisure activities in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the comparison of time spent, in minutes per day, by UK males and females on household and leisure activities in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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These charts
illustrates
Change the verb form
illustrate
show examples
what both
gender
Change to a plural noun
genders
show examples
do
Wrong verb form
did
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their free time in the UK in 2008.
It is clear that
Linking Words
women spend
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of time in housework activities.
Womens
Correct your spelling
Women
show examples
most
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
spent
time
Correct quantifier usage
more time
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
cooking and washing 45 times
than
Correct quantifier usage
more than
show examples
men .
While
Linking Words
the least chore they do is repair and the average was less than 20
Use synonyms
minute
Fix the agreement mistake
minutes
show examples
per
day
Use synonyms
. Reading books was similar with men with
1
Add a hyphen
1-minute
show examples
minute
Use synonyms
difference per
day
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
While
Change preposition
For
show examples
men their less
prefer
Wrong verb form
preferred
show examples
was spots and clothing washing
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
approximately 15
Use synonyms
minute
Change to a plural noun
minutes
show examples
per
day
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
statistics
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
that they
more
Add a missing verb
are more
show examples
into spending their
day
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
watching TV, radio,
video
Correct word choice
and video
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
one hundred and
thirty seven
Add a hyphen
thirty-seven
show examples
Use synonyms
minute
Change to a plural noun
minutes
show examples
. To summarize, the most significant
diffrence
Correct your spelling
difference
average was in housework
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
in cooking and washing . Ang the
similiraties
Correct your spelling
similarities
were with reading books.
Submitted by farahmansoor401 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words minute, day with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Comparison
  • Household activities
  • Leisure activities
  • Average
  • Significantly more/less
  • Markedly more/less
  • Striking difference
  • Counterparts
  • Societal norms
  • Differing interests
  • Dedicated time
  • Household tasks
  • Maintenance
  • Repairs
  • Pursuits
  • Socializing
  • Gender divide
  • Traditional roles
  • Allocation of time
  • Reflects
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