IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The charts below show the comparison of time spent, in minutes per day, by UK males and females on household and leisure activities in 2008.

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The chart show comparison of time spent,in minutes per day,in the UK
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it compares males and females on household and
leisuer
Correct your spelling
leisure
 activities in 2008.
Frist
Correct your spelling
First
 of all
in
Punctuation problem
, in
show examples
 the leisure activities
the
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
men
Use synonyms
 spend more time in tv,
radio
Verb problem
listening to the radio
show examples
,
video
Verb problem
playing video
show examples
 game and
sports
Verb problem
participating in sports
show examples
more
Rephrase
apply
show examples
than
women
Use synonyms
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
women
Use synonyms
 read more than
men
Use synonyms
 by beat.
Use synonyms
women
Capitalize the word
Women
show examples
 dominate in household activities like cooking and washing
around
Punctuation problem
, around
show examples
 78 minutes a
day
Punctuation problem
day,
show examples
 double
the
Correct pronoun usage
that of
show examples
men
Use synonyms
all so
Punctuation problem
. Also,
show examples
 in shopping
and
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
 clothes washing
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 ironing female higher
Linking Words
then
Use the right word
than
show examples
Use synonyms
men
Punctuation problem
men,
show examples
 mostly because most
men
Use synonyms
 works avery day in week
when
Punctuation problem
. When
show examples
 they go
home
Punctuation problem
home,
show examples
 they
mostly
Verb problem
are mostly
show examples
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
tired.I think mothers need to stay home with the kids.
Linking Words
Overall
Punctuation problem
Overall,
show examples
women
Use synonyms
 are more active in
household
Correct article usage
the household
show examples
not
Punctuation problem
, not
show examples
 like
men
Use synonyms
most
Punctuation problem
, most
show examples
 of the time in work.

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "comparison" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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