Many high-level positions in company are filled by men ,even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 60 per cent for women companies shoub be required to allocate a certain percentage if these positions for women. for what extened do you agree with that

#positions #company #men #workforce #countries #cent #women #companies #shoub #percentage

In several organisations, management levels are often given to males when women account for 60

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

of the manpower in

first

world countries. Due to the imbalance and prejudice in

this

, I disagree that a certain percentage should be allowed as one should be handed a position based on their merits and capabilities.

Firstly

Remove the article

apply

individuals capabilities should be

assesed

Correct your spelling

assessed

based on their knowledge and

hardwork

Correct your spelling

hard work

that is

contributed to the organisation and not their gender. If a females

puts

Change the verb form

put

Correct your spelling

incomparable

Add an article

the

comparable effort towards a project and

Change the verb form

are

overlooked due to her sex, the unfairness in the system becomes obvious. Women are now empowered to think on the feet and be as

self sufficient

Add a hyphen

self-sufficient

to their male counterparts.

Secondly

, with the progression of time

Add a comma

many women have several roles to play. She could be tied down to looking after her family and juggling work at the same time.

However

this

does not affect her

drrive

Correct your spelling

drive

and performance at work. The old school thought of women being in the kitchen should be eradicated from

this generations minds and roles

Change to a genitive case

the minds and roles of this generation

this generation's minds and roles

which were once dominated

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apply

by men should be entrusted to women. In conclusion, I believe that giving a higher position should be in line with

Add an article

the

dedication that a person puts in towards their work and not based on their gender. With equality in the workforce, especially in developed nations, it will encourage women from around the world as they know they would be treated with the same fairness and equality that they deserve.

Submitted by sanjani_basdeo on Wed Sep 02 2020

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

251 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many high-level positions in company are filled by men ,even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 60 per cent for women companies shoub be required to allocate a certain percentage if these positions for women. for what extened do you agree with that

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learning English is important Agree or disagree?

International travel has become more affordable and many countries are opening their doors to increase the number of tourists. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this.

Some people think that teachers should be able to ask distruptive children to leave the class. Do you think it is the best way to deal with distruptive children in the classroom? What other solutions are there?

Some people think that a huge amount of time and money is spent on the protection of wild animals, and that this money could be better spent on the human population. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people say that advertising is extremely succesful at persuading as to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your opinion.